Ups and downs, round and round

Be happy?

2012-01-22T04:04:00.000+08:00

After watching the latest episode of gossip girl, i just can't get a clue

on wat's Blair doing!!

How could she believed that it was her praying that keep Chuck alive and

there she went and leave Chuck for good?

Hmm...i just don't think this is that kind of sacrifices one should make to keep the loved one happy or safe or whatever?

Sometimes, a temporary happiness is way valuable than having a long time of being lost and feeling helpless.

Alright, some could be very positive to make the sacrifice counts and start take life

seriously and do not bring those who love you down but deep down, how happy can you be?

losing the love of your life and be more successful?

What Serena said was right, you just can't lie to yourself thinking that such sacrifice

is the deal between god to keep him alive..

I just think that, sacrifices to be made are varies to various situation and loving one

doesn't mean that you have to let one go during the difficult time to give

one happiness. Love is about sticking together and go through all the thick and thin regardless of how the end is.

One shall not lie to own self when it's about feelings, you can't truly listen to your heart, who else can you listen to?

only you know what you want in life and what make you happy, don't hesitate ppl..

stop looking further, what you want might just nearby..you just gotta reach out your

hand and grab the chances that will take you there.

I believe, nobody on this planet doesn't want to be happy..short term or long term,

it's life..how much can you count? you can't count how long you wanna be happy,

just do what makes you happy and after all you will realize life is just so simple.

Owh well, that is how i think yet nothings come easy...

I guess this is the reason why god has given us a longer life span, perhaps our ability to understand what is life is much weaker than the other creatures on earth.

Btw, it's CNY holidays!

Wishing all the Chinese a very prosperous year!!

And i do know how to be happy (:

Loves,

Seanna

Ending of 2011

2012-01-16T02:33:00.001+08:00

Times travel along with silent, it just flies as usual but as I'm growing older

it just never slow down and getting faster and quicker..

the whole year of 2011, it has been fun and i barely remember in details what I've done

throughout the year.

I met new friends, i lost some elders..i guess, this is life? Feeling glad that i still have

my love ones around, hope everything will remain the same always...it's too painful to lose and it's too contradictory to move one.

Owh well, just got to learn to appreciate...being older is about being wiser

isn't it?

After so long of MIA, here are pictures of my 11's dec...

I just wanna say that "i had a great 2011"

Hmm..pictures since mid of Dec


Had a good celebration @ Jake's charbroil..retard face?

Rib eye-med well

Sirloin steak- med well

Deco fro x'mas @ Jake's

Hmmm...too full and DESSERT!!


The best brownies ice-cream that i've ever tasted!

One of the day @ Canton-i with

Khy, Vincent, Gary & Jay

My first time..

Lai zi gai!! sedaaaap!!

Sweet n sour fish..this is damn best! *drool*

22nd of Dec- Dong Zi

Woke up pretty early for this

TANG YUEN

and here's da end-product! nyoom

Random day

Steamed egg..by me!

my fav sea food- small small lala!


Best to eat the lil lala with the gravy!!

Happy New Year!!

12.am on the 1st

day of

2012

This is too blur..fireworks @ K.L

12's January

I've dyed my hair with Liese bubble hair color


weee!!

Time flies,

it's CNY soon and I have SHOPPING to do..

and gotta end this entry with

wishing you all a Happy New Year!!

Loves,

Seanna.

Brb

2012-01-12T04:02:00.005+08:00

Will soon be backed in action,

exam is a killer =/

Stay tuned....

The Musical, Aladdin

2011-12-08T17:56:00.001+08:00

Remember the awesome musical i mentioned earlier?

It was really good and was so enjoyable, the crowd response has say it all.

Pretty funny and very nicely done by the cast.

On the way to Sunway!


Sis happily holding the ticket. Thanks to Avante!!


Snap some X'mas @ Pyramid deco before entering

*
*
*

Aladdin the Musical!! Big poster welcoming everybody

Teee-weeee!!

The beginning, enjoy every dance.

There comes Aladdin!!

The bad Jafar!!

Photo by Amelia of Chronicalsofshorty bloggie

The cave of wonders. Want a wish?


Genie!!!

Really had fun watching it, Genie was too cutee!!

Time to say ciaaooo..and

more photos are otw..

Love Food.

2011-11-29T02:10:00.001+08:00

Well, this entry is so gonna be a photos post!

I will have all the recent photos, hmm..more like random photos posted

below.

Some people just don't like to read entry with words and therefore, I had my time clicking on my PICASA to make all the photos taken via my phone look better.

Hehe... here we go!


First, it will be my ACT CUTE shot.

Having this color lens make my eyes pretty not comfy even thou it's damn pretty! =/


Jeh and I act cute during wedding dinner.

The dinner was pretty boring, that's why acting cute again..


Makan Beefball noodles @ K.L

Eigen drove all the way down to K.l to enjoy beefball noodles from

Soong Kee with Melia babe...Nyoom, best sekali!

The sky last week was pretty weird.


The sky later @ night. I still feel weird..haha

It was a random shot while i was otw home from K.Damansara and otw home

after Paranormal activity marathon @ melia's house.

Later that day, I went to OUG Pasar MLM..I smell foooods!

Asam Laksa and it's yummy!

Before Asam Laksa, My bro and I gotta Taste the best snack ever!

Can you see the people queuing just for that snack?

Guess wat?

It's Stinky Tou Fu A.K.A CHAO TAO FU

It's too yummy, but not as stink as the one i first tried in K.L

nyoom...still... best with the chilies sauce and cabbage.

The day after, went to Korean Restaurant with classmates,

managed to snap photos..haha

CORN TEA-I kinda like it

Kimchi SOUP! Yumm yummm (:

Side dishes and the main one in the middle.

Korean Chopstick and spoon. pretty long and fine

Bulgogi!

Korean fried sticky rice cake. not bad thou

Steamed Eggs..nyooom

Arggh..all these foods are just too good..

isn't it good to be a human?..hahaa

Here come the end, the next entry is definitely for the Aladdin Musical as I'm

so looking forward to it. Yay!!

and Taylor swift loves baking for this winter season!! http://instagr.am/p/WbeEV/

Cheers.

Genie Please Appear!

2011-11-24T15:09:00.005+08:00

Aladdin!!

Did I just remind you about genie?
That's my favorite Disney character back in my childhood time, and I finally have got the
chance to watch it for real!!
I bet you did imagine it to be performed right in front of your eyes when you were small..*wink*
Here is the chance and I'm so gonna watch the play..well, i wanna feel my childhood again!!

Aladdin Musical @ Sunway Amphitheater

The play will begin on the 25th of November 2011 - 2nd January 2012

The screenings are only once a day from Sunday to Friday @ 8p.m.
( There will be no screening on Tuesday)

Twice on Saturdays @
i) 7:15p.m
ii) 9:15p.m

Also, specially on these dates:
* 25th December (Sunday)
* 1st January (Sunday)

The tickets are selling as the price below:
Adults
RM 300, RM250, RM200, RM100

Children up to 12 yrs old
RM50

Any enquiries or information could be obtain from the websites below:

visit www.sunwaylagoon.com

www.fb.com/sunwaylagoonMsia

www.twitter.com.sunwaylagoon1

*Seating charts are as below

See you there (:

Credits to melia (http://chronicalsofshorty.blogspot.com/) for the photos.

Depressing?

2011-11-23T01:31:00.004+08:00

From the middle of October to the ending of November, I believe this period of time ain't
so well as I myself already experienced a few of unpleasant incidents.

Strangely, it is a period that most of my friends have gone into emotional and it is just
so coincident. I wonder why? Apart from that, November is said to be a good month for
all as it's 11.2011? i guess its the 11 that matters and there are many couples had their
engagement and their wedding on November.

Well, i think it is a good month for people to get married but it is not a good month for
young couples around me. I have 4 friends of mine went into the status of
"single from the status of in a r.ship" on the same week.

I can't help to scratch head wondering why is everybody having the similar problems and
had it ended on the same month?
well, a break up doesn't come in a day or two, it came along with a few weeks of struggling
and uncertain.

As a friend, I did come across with all my friends' problems and try to advice them
or listen to them as best as i could. Listening is a virtue and is a good deed isn't it?
Indeed, i feel quite proud for myself to be such a patience person as well as a good friend.
*tsk* self praising... *shy*

The point is, I just couldn't help myself from being affected by my friends emotions.
Like i usually say, I'm not a superwoman nor a saint, my emotions get shakey and not steady
in times. Because of their problems and their way of making a decision towards the relationship,
it kinda like scare me. I started to reflect myself as in like taking them as an example, if i constantly behaving that way in my relationship, will my bf react the same way as my friend?
And therefore, resulting a depressing breakup?

This just came to me, i just had to start thinking.
As my bf always say, i always think a lot, sometimes i can even think beyond something...
Along with all these depressing stories, i just started to think even more..started to wonder
is it a certain for a person to react such way?

I certainly didn't show my "thinking a lot" while advising or listening to my friends' problems,
i tried to be rational and advice them the right thing to do and the right way to have things
sorted out.
After all the long chat and granny stories, some of them will feel better and so they will
stop being emotional for a while...yesh, it's just for a while...haha
but some of them, they're rather stubborn and continue with all their nonsense thoughts in mind.
Stuffs that don't exist would affect them badly and make them have tasteless meal everyday.

Isn't it funny? humans are just too different in terms of thinking.

The funniest is that i was rational enough to advice them and ask them not to think too much, but for my own, i just think as far as i could and as ridiculous as i may.

This is my one big problem.
Hmm..I gotta admit it. I can just get affected and start to take others problems to be in my situation.
Rational doesn't always happen after all.

I guess this does happen to everyone, knowing too many of negative stuffs does make someone
weaker and does pull someone down.
The only solution to this is, believe in good thing. To have faith and to believe not all will
end up this way and even if it does, doesn't mean you were wrong. Rather believe in it and
fight for it than losing it cause you didn't even have the guts and faith to keep urself go further.

It is hard and it takes time, some may only realize it and actually practicing it in an hour
its like " thanks god u make me realize this "
Some might taking years to realize that. I guess i'm one of them...
Lol...I shall hypnotize myself and convince myself to believe.

And here is something that i would like to share,
I was watching Luanlegacy today, one of the statement was so true,
Luanlegacy said " You might feel worthless coz the one you love dumped you, but you're still priceless to many people around you, so just cry all you want when you have a bad break up and be alright a.s.a.p"

Haha..this bitchy dude does have a point, break upers can You tube him, he can speak like
a girl as if he does understand girls.

Good night readers.

Beautiful Prom Night

2011-11-10T15:51:00.010+08:00

After months of working hard and forging out own time for SEGI prom night, it has finally come to an end. It was such a beautiful night, every lady and gentleman dressed elegantly to the event.

I was so impressed that the team of us has actually come to the night and it like a finally for us, we worked it out and the night worth all the hard works. We sweat along and laugh along to present this wonderful prom night to every student in SEGi.

The night before prom..tired as a dead fish.

The interior of the deco..it costs a number.

Reception area i just like the backdrop so much!

The photo taking Backdrop..it's nice too.

Yeah..You see this? It looks so grand..transforming from MPH

Gladly, the event was ended so successfully with all the wonderful people in the college. Performances were nicely done and the time there are much memorable...photos and videos were a must for that night, capturing all the beautiful participants and leave a very deep memory for their college life.

Apparently, most people were dressed in purple colour including myself...such a purple fever!
My dress was a gift by my love one, a purple long dress...i love it so much and such a dress make my night even better...Thanks shoo much!!

The food there was quite good too, it wasn't that great during the food testing time but it end up quite presentable and Sedap!!

I got to meet some of long lost friends too, realized some of them having mutual friends with me. The world is quite small after all and this beautiful night has just gather everybody and captured beautiful moments that we had.

Welcoming the VVIP.

Performance by Ms. SEGi
belly dancing..

Intro of first couple of prom queen & king
they bought this costume specially for our event and
it looks amazingly good on them and
of cause the costume ain't CHEAP.

Jocelyn- one of the prom queen candidate
Myself- the beautiful purple dress from baby
and of cause my so called DATE of the night-Iqbal.

Obviously, they become the prom queen and king
for the night!!

I met with my high sch friend..so long since we
last met!

Wing fong aka my lady-baby
Myself again
and Darwin, the cute one.

Last but not least, i managed to take this picture
right before i left..part of the committee is ere
Aww...so memorable!

Such great night doesn't come everyday, we worked for it especially the committee on board.
they gave their 100% for this and it was indeed a good return. Even though most of us was
not able to enjoy the night like the others but the memories are certainly very special and
indeed memorable.

I will blog more about the night once i get all the pictures, i'm waiting for the 5 photographers of the night to upload all!! (:

Can't breathe easy.

2011-07-26T23:54:00.004+08:00

There is a song metaphoring missing is a kind of pain even when you breathe. It goes all around your body when you miss somebody.

The feeling of sourness is everywhere as if it's going through your veins causing a slight thorny pain inside your skin or even deep in the flesh.
Such pain was metaphoring the sorrow of missing the love one...you miss him but you can't get to
see him.
You can't get to tell him how much you love him,
You can't get to let him know that you care,
You can't get to talk to him like your best buddy,
You can't get to update him about your everything,
You just can't......

It's such painful that you have the strength to love but you don't have the energy to hold your love.

Why?

It just happen when you fail to hold someone tight when you had the chance..
you tried, you became tired and then you have the thoughts to give up...and it just keep haunting
you, asking you to just let it be and let it go...
regardless of how you actually feel towards the one you love.

When love brought two together, it becomes an obligation? a challenge? a obstacle for other stuffs?
These make love becomes vague, your heart refuse to sense its existence, you will most probably sense the tiredness and toughness within it.

And...all humans are weak when come to love..they would not surrender to tonnes of works which bring unlimited stress but they would surrender to stress that were formed by love...
stress resulting from dealing with your love one..

how to compromise?
how to improve?
how to argue less?
how to plan for the future?
how to resolve financial problem?

All these are stress that hardly would come to an end...
thus, people choose to give up, choose to throw tantrum and eventually it just lead to a bad break up...

After all these dramas, when it is time to think calmly and reminisce, its time to miss the one you chose to give up...
started to ask yourself, why didn't you hold on to it?
ask how did it come to this?
ask why didn't he/she assure me?
ask why love isn't enough to hold both together?

The answer is,
it's not about love being not strong enough or love is not everything...
it's about the way you look @ it...how much you actually appreciate it...
how you treat it....
its not about loving someone more then you will love yourself less.
its how you love yourself to love others better.

想念是会呼吸的痛，
已拥有的就得珍惜...

Ideal colleague.

2011-07-04T23:05:00.004+08:00

Ever since the begin of my internship, every morning can say to be dreadful as as night owl gotta wake up early to hunt! haha...

It's never be easy to wake up early even if I've slept for more than 7 hours..it's just morning! that's da problem!!...

haha...suddenly, lee hom just appeared in my mind...what if he's in my office and i gotta see him everyday over there...
omaigossh..i'm so gonna jump up when my alarm rings..

he does give me such motivation as he's just so charming!! imagining him talking to you and joking with u..lol..it would be shooo cutteee!!!

Awww...he's just so cutee!! (:

hmm..other than lee hom,

i don't mind working with an old sexy man, Jason Stathams!!!
oh gosh, what if my manager is Jason and when he teach me how to do this and that, i will certainly be melted!!
ooopppssss!!!

Sexy man in the entry!!

Unfortunately, majority of my colleagues are girls~!!!
no fun!!! i can't imagine them to be the sexiest actress like Jessica Alba or Megan fox! coz accountant could never have that look..=/

if i could just look @ them and imagine that, it will be damn fun! will be dam happy to go work
each day..lol
actually, now i started to work in the office..i gueess the thing that affect ur interest if actually the
people around you...

lets say u love music so so so so so much but those that u have to work with just disgust you
with their annoying attitude...it will be such a turn off and making ur passion in music slowly slowly been blinded by those disgusting stuffs.

if u are doing something that u didn't thought u would like but the people around just so friendly
and helpful, eventually u would say " owhhh..i'm lovin my job"
yeah..this is what we call working environment, it does play a big big role and therefore, there is
always best employer award for those company which is able to provide the best working
environment to the employees and discover their abilities effectively.

A good worker doesnt define by how hardworking is that person, doesn't define by how much OT
that person is willing to stay for...
being hardworking is just helping the company to finish all the tasks and not making any changes.
changes made are just the quantity of works..

A good and healthy working environment requires employees that could create a harmony in the working place and allow each staff to perform their creativity and their ability to be alert.

Working quietly and not interact with one another is kinda like wasting life?
you just spend ur life working and not having fun within it. in ur mind, u just wanna finish the task given...
where comes the fun when you hardly have fun from what you are doin most of the time.

Well..i think working is a must but having fun within it is really a necessary!

Stop working like a zombie and being dreadful, try to explore the fun within every single thing that you're doing...it's not easy, it's not straight forward but u just gotta find it with ur instinct!

Optimistic

2011-06-27T23:05:00.009+08:00

Being pessimistic?

I think i do...

it's bcoz most of my frens are telling me that, come'on stop being so negative...where's
the optimist prime?

haha...well, probably i just came from the same planet as Negatron then..

To think of transformer, i'm just so so so so so grrrr right now..

At first, i was planning to reserve the ticket sharp @ 12am for the first day screening, and i got this news saying GSC opened early booking so i try n try to book but can't and it was actually

for online purchasing..so i din't wait till 12am last nite for it...and today, i randomly logged in and apparently the booking is now available!!!

However, i failed to book coz it's so full and my first day screening is gone =/

It's so so so so so terribleeeeee!!! i feeling to just choke somebody!!

I was gonna be kiasu and be lanc infront of my frens if i could grab the first day screening show.
but now, i become one pathetic loser...hahaha

i still can't believe my long time plan becomes ashes now...grrr!!!

it's just so fun to play kiasu and then i can totally feel the shiok sendiri and go boast around..but
now is so no fun!

Ooopss..well back to being optimistic,

I barely know myself like seriously?
i just don't know if i'm that kind of positive human being or just a person who likes to think negatively..

honestly, i can really think a lot, more than you can imagine..
i guess it's a gift as i could really think and randomly some meaningful thoughts just pop out.
one thing bad is, i could really expand a situation to real bad time....

i can just instantly become psycho with the ability of my tiny brain...it's so funny when my frens telling me...owh, u think too much and i actually smile...(:

it is bad most of the time when i think beyond and it became so negative and yeah, here comes
me being pessimistic coz i always think with the usual situation that could possibly happen.
I'm that realistic till i only think of the bad happenings instead of something good or it's just fairy tales never come across my mind.. hee.

However, i wanna be more optimistic as i should just don't follow my feeling that often and try
to use my brain to analyze.
it is very suffering if i continue being realistic and i think of the worst which would happen..
coz i will have such mentality that i'm not gonna get through this shit and stuffs..
which is definitely not healthy for me as i ought to deal with my life..

i couldn't just blame all these unpleasant on people then i can try to escape from it...
that's not solving a single thing, therefore...i just have to be more optimistic and perhaps i could
make unpleasant a norm for myself..as in, i don't even think that something bad is that bad..
u know?

like i always complain about my mum nags as i couldn't stand it....and now im gonna try to
take it as something alright...to feel alright listening to such music..

i just wanna change the way i see things and my perspective to help myself...
who knows if i could discover something new and explore something more!!

I'm so gonna be optimist prime!!!

Part of my life.

2011-06-20T22:47:00.004+08:00

Have you ever feeling worthless as a member in ur family?

no matter how much u try to do, they just can't see it..or mayb they just think that
u're supposed to do those while the others are not suppose to.

It sucks u know!!!
everyone can sense that "bias" is happening on me and certainly i know it's since i was like 10?
I can totally feel how she feel about me and how she treating me...
but i don't know why until all these years, she is still the same..

i seem to be da most worthless among all even though i try to do my studies and everything best..
well..i can say i'm the only one that doesn't need them to have the extra burden on worrying...

I just know how to plan for myself and try to experience life..but in this circle..i'm more like a
cinderella...no one is sharing my feeling in this circle...all i do is just nothing and i memang have the obligation to do it while the others can just sweet talks out of it...

It just making me to hate myself for being such a person, a person that i can't have it all...
im thankful that my life is still good and im happy both of my parents are with me and staying
under the same roof.

All these will never be complete if you rarely feel love from the one u really care about and really love...
instead of love, I feel the sense of picking on..and unfairness more!
why is it happening to me?

Is it I having problem? or whatever I do they dont like?
i just cant help but to think if myself having problems with them..
it's just so sucky...feeling bias everywhr..everyday everytime...

Especially after this stupid internship started..
i tot i've finally worked like really working they will just give me more space and be understanding...
hell..the thing i get is getting nag the moment i back from work till i go out @ night..or till i facing my comp with my ear phone!

It's not fun and i just can't stand it...has been years im facing these stupid issues!!

I duan to be a bitch to complain and being " take things for graanted" but im feeeling myself
being so worthless..she just make me feel bad bout myself...

Ahh....i just wanna screeaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!

Father's day.

2011-06-19T12:58:00.013+08:00

It's so quick that it has come to june for 2011, and yeah FATHERS DAY!!!

I was home really late last night so do my brothers, so basically, there were no ppl in my hse except my poor lil dad.

I guess he was upset and feel kinda down bcoz his children are not by his side even it's on father's day.
it makes me feel really bad but i just cant have the guts and walk in to his room and talk to him..

i wonder why i just can't. I guess i was afraid that he would sound me for being home such late? or i don't know..

This one thing, i rarely express love to my family especially my dad as he is always looking strict and we just so not used to say we love each other or give each other a kiss...

I just feel awkward for doing so. therefore, i just can't really say sweet stuffs to him like happy b'day, happy fathers day or even i love you thou...
never i guess..i doubt i've ever said those greeting to him..

which i think it's quite bad... we do celebrate give presents and all but we don't say out the love within. well, i used to write to him or make a card for him or so but as i grow up, i just stopped doing so already..
feeling it's getting more shy to do it.

My godsis says we should really start showing the love before it's too late and all, i want to too but it just seems so hard...
it's making me to be a bad person and all..and it's really bad indeed.
I wonder how should I do it, just cast away my egoness and do it?

is there any ways to make it easier?
it is so sad for myself..ahahha

it's no doubt that my dad is always feeling insecure and thinking that his children are gonna leave him alone when he's old.

but it comes frm a reason, which he rarely @ home and show his love to us when we communicate.
A ego man is really hard to deal with sometimes...
So much of father's day but i cant actually wish my dad in person...sighs.

Such a useless daughter! =/
Well...hope i would have a great one with my dad later on..
Happy Father's day peep (:

Before it explodes.

2011-06-05T03:13:00.002+08:00

Randomly play this song during this hour, now i'm so addicted to it...

I replaying it like more than 5 times...can really feel it thru the lyrics and

Alexandra Burke did it nicely and totally could feel that energy.

Alexandra Burke ft Bruno Mars

It's not a question of love,
Cause our love has never changed.
But all the little things keep piling up,
And life keeps getting in the way.

Don't make this harder than it is,
We both knew it'd come to this.
Better now than in a year,
With lots of tears,
And we both hate each other.
The fuse has already left,
So how about a final kiss?
And just let it go

Stop the madness,
Before it explodes!
Before it's out of our control.
Let's stop the madness,
Before it explodes!
We gotta let it go,
Before it all explodes.

Some things we won't understand,
And we're both so tired of being misunderstood.
So let's just turn and walk away,
And hold on to what was good.

Don't make this harder than it is,
We both knew it'd come to this.
Better now than in a year,
With lots of tears,
And we both hate each other.
The fuse has already left,
So how about a final kiss?
And just let it go

Stop the madness,
Before it explodes!
Before it's out of our control.
Let's stop the madness,
Before it explodes!
We gotta let it go,
Before it all explodes.

Before it explodes!
Before it's out of our control.
Let's stop the madness,
Before it explodes!
We gotta let it go,
Before it all explodes.

The lyrics able to demonstrate the common problems in relationships...
what cause a bad break up and usually it's true..it's not about the question of love..

Relationships started with affection and slowly love takes place, slowly lil lil issues
take place too...which indirectly crashing the relationship into pieces...

lil stuffs and lil issues pile up and kept in the heart...those thing being brought up during
every small argument and someday, it will just explode...

when it explodes, it's somhow a time to test the toughness of both as well as the love.

either one chose to give up, and it will just bcome ashes.
being blown away and never gonna be da same anymore..

Kinda sad but everybody has to go through stuff like this...
such madness!!

Waking up.

2011-05-31T13:16:00.003+08:00

It's a strange morning, I lie on the bed and while whatsapp-ing with my baby and suddenly
tears drop...

tears drop out of worrying..
worry that the begin of my internship will make me to have no time for my love ones..
my beloved friends and my lovely baby.

the thoughts of waking up early and can't spend any later @ night are kinda a fear for me.
you could think that i'm looking for excuses and thinking too negatively or just being lazee to work and face the real world, but didn't you have such feeling before?

I've been working but nvr in the office, it just kinda a new thing and totally a new
environment for me. Most importantly, i gotta wake up early and sleep early!!

yeah..i just feel that i'm gonna miss the fun and if i go out late night, i would be missing to go to bed
afraid that the nex day i won't have energy for works..
it just creep me out.
yeah..dat's so negative..and i might just have no time for my friends.

well...i know i'm quite silly for this,
and now i just hoping for my work to be extremely bz and i won't have the time to think nonsense.
a thinker is always thinking wtv which is possible..ahaha
i think this is bad thou.

hoping that it is gonna be fun and im gonna have fun during these short periods.
hope it could be shorter.. (:

Melia said: i'm worrying and scare for ntg.
which is true, it's bcoz i sorta predicted the worse from it..lol

Perhaps, im afraid coz it's time for me to make decision, a decision for the nex path that im gonna take.

Once again, wish me luck peep!! (:

Love and Mr.right.

2011-05-29T19:36:00.006+08:00

they say every woman should have a husband. yeah a husband, how do you know that, it's time for you to get a husband or
it's just part of the plan in life..you do need a husband..
so u keep searching or like some other people, they waited for the Mr. right to appear in their life.

well, LOVE has no definition, it varies to different individual...
and therefore, i keep wondering
do you really need a husband to make ur life complete?
just like what other woman is doing? do you have to actually get married to fulfill ur needs? is that true that every woman should have a marriage and a husband?

if your love is about getting married and have a companion @ old age...is it right?
or you get married with a person because you love that person..
so you wanna spend the rest of ur life together wit that person..therefore you get married with that person?
they are many reasons for marrying but is there a reason to love?
i mean like...
do you wanna be married and thus you go and love? Is falling in love about getting a companion @ old age?
don't you think that most people nowadays they choose a man and
that man must fulfill their requirement to be a husband?
i guess majority of them yes.
they choose a bf whom can give them a future, a marriage and a family..
this is what most ppl are looking for...they want a family.

just like the old saying ' the only ppl who would always be with you is ur family'
ur career, ur frens, ur banglo can't give u a sense of belonging.
so..now im wondering, is it a must for a woman to be married? to have a family? and have kids? is it what a woman need?
would you still be happy without a marriage?
and is loneliness that bad?

Towards this, i just think that there's many people in this world..we all experience different things we see different things and we have a different brain.
so..why must we follow the routine of life? i just think that, having a different lifestyle from others doesn't mean that u're not successful, doesn't mean that u're incomplete.

by that, i don't think there's a must b that way and when u do something that majority people won't do, doesn't mean that its wrong..
it's just depends on the value behind it.
would you prefer to be like the others or you wanna be urself or look for the kind of life that you want before you actually hurt someone.

heart is there to feel and a brain is there for you to make choices.

Thinking of these,
it's all coz of Julia Robert's eat pray love...
well..this show is kinda boring and lame i think
but @ some point it does make me think and here i am.

EAT PRAY LOVE.

work and fun.

2011-05-20T19:39:00.005+08:00

it's a rainy day at last, been a few days of hotness around us with the dusty haze.

is working that scary and terrible?
nex month im gonna start my very first job in the office which require me to wake up super early around 7? and go back home during the evening...

come to think of it, it's scaring me as i'm so used to waking up late and doing everything later than 9 in the morning...i just afraid that i can't adapt to it like most of my fren did.

they keep telling me that when u start working, u can forget about having a life!
gosh...they meant goin out and having fun till late night like what a college students usually do..
that's why most working adults are missing the days back in college.

I'm just so don't feel lik having my life just 8-5 and 8-5 everyday....kinda routine and very dull!!

so..I'm very reluctant to start working in the office or start off a proper job that require waking up early and feeling exhausted the whole day n go home in the everning. once u're home, u just lie on bed and get half paralyze till the nex day and u bust with ur routine again....

According to what my frens said, they hardly find time to chill @ night and rarely have time to
do fun things anymore.. when u're out at night..all u're thinking about is goin home to sleep coz u
gotta wake up early tml for the same damn routine..

Basically, I don't see any fun in it unless i love my job..i hope i do by nex month...i hope i do find my passion in there and make it my motivation...
at least, i won't be so boring and experience mentally tiredness which is quite frustrating...

Do prove me wrong!!!!!

I need someone to tell me that, working in the office is not that bad...and u could have fun from there along with ur colleagues and all...
Gosh..i hope i could!!!

To me, life is about adventuring and learning from experience...i do hope it is an interesting one and not some routine and dull lifestyle which will literally kill me?

I wanna appreciate life with my own passion and not to appreciate it as people told me so...

I'm still in the mid of searching for the meaning of it actually...when i do, i guess i can be happier or i shud say i can be more motivated?

yeah...it's not that im not happy now, it's just lacking of something now....
and i believe everyone has their very own perspective of life and what's meaningful for them.
somehow, listening to the experienced one doesn't mean that you will end up the same.

You just gotta dig it and dig again...till you get the answer of all...
as time goes by, I'm now an adult like finally?...I guess it would be the time for me to realize many things which indirectly assist me to find my own path.

Hope I will make a difference eventually....wish me luck people!! (:

If it's blue, then just paint it pink.

2011-05-14T02:43:00.005+08:00

Have you watched a Korean movie called " a story sadder than sadness" ? It's a very touching show, it's about a couple they are always together since young and their relationship is like brother and sister. however, they fell for each other as they grow up but they have never confess each other about their love. As such, they remain as brother and sister...until one day

the guy found out that he has brain tumor and the girl is still naively treating him like a brother without knowing he has such sickness..
one day she ask the guy:' what's ur biggest dream ? then da guy said my biggest dream is to see you marrying a good man and living happily ever after.

that girl was sad as she really in loved with him...

unfortunately, one day she came to realize that he actually suffering from brain tumor and he only left 6 months to go...therefore, she went and approach a real decent doctor and fall in love with the doctor and they get married b4 the guy died.

she did not know his biggest dream is to be together with her till his death.
So, she pretended that she was very happy and thought it's the best that she can do for the guy.

however, that guy was really sad but he has to suck it up and finally he passed away due to the cancer.

after few days of his funeral, the doctor found his wife which is the girl suicides in the bath tub.
she wrote a note there saying, ' i have tried my best to achieve the dream that u wanted and now u're gone and i'm goin to accompany you in the heaven.'

This story sounds quite silly but it's really touching in a way....

it's sad but what if a relationship is meant to be no future...is it even sadder?
you are in love with a guy so much but you just can't have any future plan with that person as
both can't really go far just like people say, tis love is one of the impossible kind?

you are together with a guy u love and both have the mutual understanding this won't go far,
it's like waiting for the time to come just as people are waiting for the coming of 2012.

it's actually quite sad, but all the memories being together are just priceless.

'Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.'
quoted by Sydney smith

for example hiking, u keep hiking and climbing cause you would wanna hike till the end and see what's so nice over the other end. once u start u won't wanna stop as there's somthing waiting for u to explore.

it's somwhr similar ere, you start to fall in love knowing there's an dead end but u still wanna for further as you wanna know what's great along the way..i call it love, loving urself and loving the one u fell for cause you have to be true to urself.

It could be sad at the end but along the way the joy is much more valuable as u work for it ur effort is there with a strong passion.

We only live once, why would wanna lie to urself for this one opportunity?
since you are allow to live once, just be true to urself and be fair to the others doing what your heart is telling you to do not like u're committing a sin..

Life is about falling, putting effort, standing up again, making unbelievable to be believable...
letting people putting a full stop for you is not a way to experience, if everything was planned and you just have to carry it out as follow, it won't be interesting and it won't be real anymore....
its something like the sad story, if he was to be true to his own feeling and tell the girl, the girl wont have to miss the chance of telling him that she loves him.

life is about writing a story book, how would you want urs to be?

Must watch Korean movie!! Pei San recommended and I cried..amazingly!

Who says!!

2011-04-21T01:49:00.005+08:00

Selena Gomez & The Scene- Who says!

It's by Selena Gomez and the scene!!

Thanks babe for recommending, this song is real encouraging as u mentioned!! *like*

I just like the lyrics being so real and i guess most of the teenagers really needs a song like this
other than those with " fcking around" as the lyrics..ahahha
It's just too vain to actually keep listening to song which keep mentioning about clubs and sex!
It's so BORING!!!

" who says " is kinda common song as almost every young singer has songs with similar meanings
encouraging the youngster to be more optimistic and not closing up themselves in one corner.

I just like the part when she sings :
Who says!
Who says you're not perfect,
Who says you're not worth it,
Who says you're the only one that's hurting?
Trust me, that's the price of beauty,
Who says you're not pretty,
Who says you're not beautiful?
Who says!

Owh gossshh..as if she just slap you on the face saying " hey young lady, pls look urself into the mirror, confidence is all you needs to be urself and be different"

Can't stop singing along..weee!!!

Who cares about what other say man! Just fcking be urself and you could be perfect just like
what pink said!!!

I is loving all these encouraging songs baby!!! these could make the world brighter too!!!

Prom Nite Glamour

2011-04-15T02:40:00.002+08:00

Hey guys, this is an entry about my college prom night....

Which is SEGi UC!!! A prom with the theme Le Rêve will be presented end of this year..

Of cause, to make such an amazing and beautiful night happen...we do need everybody supports!!

Support and yesh I mean SPONSORSHIP!! I do hope FOR kind advises and offers here, do drop by and comment (:

Your help will be much appreciated!! (:

Truth and it's true

2011-04-10T02:02:00.002+08:00

when you're dating a person its like taking one long course about that person, then when you break up its like all that knowledge is wasted" -ted mosby

Based on the above statement, i wonder how many people would agree with that or it's just a painful fact...more than just agreed?

To me,
it's pretty true, it's nothing like u won't be sad after a period of time being with a person and something happened, both just had to be separated and all the memories, knowing, understanding and trust are just gone.

Pretty sad thou as human is always seeking to be better, better here is to describe
to know your partner better and sustain the relationship longer and even forever could take place..
however, emotional gets in plus all the surrounding circumstances, leaving took place...
you been spending most or ur time to figure out how this person is, how to love this person better, how to make more surprises and make this person happier...and after sometime,
that person just gotta leave you aside as he/she is no longer has faith or no longer attached with you...

It feel as if you spend most of ur time practicing law and suddenly your lecturer just tell you that
it is no longer in ur syllabus and the feeling is like..."wtf ?...i spent my time on it and it's nothing now?"
it is just like ur knowledge about law has to be gone with the wind as it's no longer applicable on this particular course.

it's the same to a r.ship...what's left is just those broken memories during b.up mixing with the past sweet memories and commitment. these memories are just memories as the knowledge being learned from the person is no longer needed coz the person is gone...

it is really sad but somethings valuable has gotta be there from gaining those knowledge....
Such as the way of handling things btw two persons and also the way to control own emotions and all..these are just priceless...
sometimes, you've gotta experience it to know how it tastes and how it helps in ur life..

heart broken, everybody has to go through it because our heart are not metal-made..
it's so fragile and yet sensible...it allows us to feel and allow us to be strong...

if it's no longer in ur syllabus, try to apply the knowledge somewhere else, i bet there's something else similar to it...
feeling wasted @ that moment but to think of it, it could be better if you could just think of
it's experience and it's for ur life...from there, you could be stronger and be smarter...

P/s: stay strong and you'll be smarter (:

What do you really want?

2011-04-08T03:20:00.004+08:00

Life has so much to do and so much to deal with....and some people just wanna make their life as good as possible, or shud i say to be perfect?

there are plenty of perfectionist in this world, they just want life to be perfect, no mistakes no regrets and no ugliness...
However, the reality is just so cruel...human are born to make mistakes!
it's not an insulting statement, it's the fact..that we see it everyday...
coz in this goddam world, there is no exact right or wrong...

whatever a person do is based on his own favor...of coz in times, he expect majority of people to follow or to agree with him as well..
when he thinks that this is actually right and beneficial, he will do..regardless of other consequences..

and people who always think for the others and restrict themselves to do certain things are given this comment " aiyorr..u're thinking too much...toooo much la!" in fact, such " thinking too much" people are not exactly that jobless to think so much, it is that they just wanna make things right and don't want any negative feedback..

based on this 2 type of ppl, they are similar in a way which is wanna make things right and no regrets..
however the method of carrying thing out is just opposite...and this will bring to da same result.. mistakes! it happens cause human were born to think differently...

they have different opinion and own perspective or i can say prejudice? yeah...dats why...when u're trying extremely hard to make thing right, some people just think that its just not right...

then where does the perfect thing come from?? its not that nobody is perfect, its that we CAN'T be perfect...
this is the nature.. it will make u feel like a fool to keep making sth better when another group of people is there to comment...

somtimes, its not about you're not good enuff..its about who is there to see ur efforts... whether that person feels it and appreciate it....

it could be no mistake @ this second, but another minute its just sucks... isn't it funny? god just create us and we thought that being great and brilliant is da way to have a life have you ever think of it?

if we weren't born to be brilliant or rich, how do we have a life? think of the people @ rural area? think of the people who suffer from starving? why would they still struggling to survive?...they knew they cant be as perfect?

To me,
Life is not all about glamor, fame, luxurious and brilliant...it has got to be something else.. that something else could be varies to different people...

just find ur own need, what kind of life would make u feel best and perfect...no matter how others comment bout it...

we can't be perfect but we could make those mistakes tat we make daily to be something worthwhile to your life... explore the meaning within it...and thats the ideal living that you want...
doesn't matter if other thinks that you're plain stupid or plain naive...one day, when they see the smile on ur face..they will understand....

its about believing in urself after all... (:

Unexpectedly

2011-04-06T01:41:00.002+08:00

Are you afraid ? Afraid of something that u are trying to prevent it from happening...

If that something is gonna happen within your expectation, how is it like? Do u rather let it happen
without ur knowledge?

I know how it feel, it is like you are so afraid of injection but you just have to get it done...the moment you see the fine needle poke into ur skin and slowly into ur muscle.... OUCCCHH!
Don't you just feel the pain?

Similarly, if things that you think it will happen just the matter of time and you're so fear of it..
when it actually present infront of you, it will give such expressions la.." Scream" " stone"
"scared" "Speechless" "hide urself" all these...are the natural response...

As if the nightmare is finnally arrived!!! * Taaa daaaa!!* well..it's definitely not a surprise!
It's just an unexpected disaster!! Just as if 2012 is coming and you're not sure of it and what if
it finally happened?....that will be damn SHOCKING and the expressions of
*stoning* *screaming* *Scared* *giggling*....those epic xrpessions!!

And slowly, these will lead to brain overfunctioned...it just overload and keep thinking and thinking
how how and how?
as if u're in the middle of dark jungle have no where and no direction to go...all you know is " owh shit..I'm Stucked"
yeah..STUCKED! when ur brain tend to think a lot and a lot, definitely there won't provide you
any solution but STUCKED!

Get it! it just stucked as if the bloood stucked in ur vein and u instantly feel as if u're gonna faint!

It could be similar with Brain freeze!! oooppppss..reminds me of watermelon lycee from Vichudda..hehehe

It's really not fun to actually bump into someone that you dun wanna see..
you will get stucked cause you don't know whr to hide...and it just bother you with the existence of that person...you can't focus and well...stoning and speechless take place..xD

half 一半

2011-04-04T19:38:00.005+08:00

Loneliness kill?

It is such a popular song but I din know about it only after my jeh sing the song @ ktv!!
She's a banana yet she got to know the song earlier than i do...makes me feel so outdated.hahaha

This is a song of a lonely girl saying she's always feeling halved as she has no one to be with her,
she spend all her time @ work and being alone....it sounds kinda sad and to me, i can't help but to actually imagine that what if one day I'm all alone and nobody to share all my ups and downs.

what is happiness is just not enough if i were to be alone?
nobody could share and it just sounds damn sad...

Nobody wants to be lonely and nobody wants to be restricted from doing many things..but it is happening to many people...that is why some couple just can't live without each other.

it is hard to handle heartbroken it is because it is harder to face the loneliness in the future..
humans are just so funny, we afraid many things...afraid to be loved and afraid to love..all these
are just like a scary movie as though it will haunt us day by day.
it would be pathetic to be lonely but could it be more pathetic to be afraid of the coming of loneliness?

I think everybody could be as pathetic when come to this, just like the nature cycle...
ppl get married so that there's a companion when you're old, ppl have children to ensure there's still a companion when their love one is gone...
we keep searching for companion since da day we were born, we have friends we have bf/gf we have siblings, we have cousins and all relatives...all these are just in nature..human biggest fear is to be lonely.

Life to live

2011-02-18T01:39:00.003+08:00

This statement keep goin round and round my mind
" everybody has a life to live "

Is it true that everybody has a different life to live and that makes the different among all the
human beings in this world?

do we have a choice to choose before we were delivered to this world from our mother's generous
stomach?

We then given a life to live..what kind of life u want, how you wanna live it out and who shall u live it with?
Are these all on our control?

I hope i do have some of it on my hand so that I could just freely do what I think is right for me
and do things that I really wanna do...

Controls are seriously a scary thing...
if one lose control, worst thing will knock the door
if one is being controlled and barely move, devil will knock the door of that person's soul
if one is rationally controlling him/herself without others disagree and controls, i think that person could really see a brighter light ahead.

Why do they always wanna control?
I mean parents, they are just so worried and they do not want anything bad happen to their children, the only choice for them is to control...no for this and no for that...
Controlling without a proper consideration and understanding of the situations are called stupidity...why???

simple fact, how does rebellious come from?
why ppl wanna rebel? its not that she doesn't have what she wants such as money foods or watsoever, it's that the freedom being granted is too limited.
why does a kid lie?...if he had gone to somewhr else that parents don't let them go, they would lie when parents ask a question about it...

Since when does the controlling lead to lies?
isn't it funny?
Parents control n to hope to see the better from their kids but somethings just have to be done
based on situation and not just blindly control like i said earlier " controlled and barely move"
it will either lead to rebellious or escape for good...

parents control but kids just dun want them to make a big fuss of what they are not allow to do,
they lied for it...the more they lie, the further they walk and some couldn't even turn their
head back..

controlling is not the best way...just like everybody has their life to live, if you control their life..
it's just lik putting a bird in the net and limiting them to expand their wings and fly.

A bird being trapped is just like a person without own thoughts and confidences...
because whatever they wanna do, they scare and they worried it would upset somebody..
also because they are really trapped and the habits of being trapped stop them from walking further when they are released from it.

Everybody has a life to live, don't catch it and keep it to ur own expectations...cause
she can't be you and you can't be her...

Change Or Stay

2011-02-16T02:16:00.006+08:00

"They are all good man before something happened to them"

Statement taken from Gossip girl, it's a line from Blair Waldorf trying to convince her best fren
Serena to stop fixing her awful past but to start looking forward to the future with
the all time good man...which is Dan!!

Aww...
she said that as all man are good before something happened and changed them. however, there
are some people who do not change to be worse even many things hit them.
they say guy like this are people who are worth spending the rest of the life with....they are
always so true and so faithful no matter what happen...

There are many guys outside who are rather emotional when something hit them and
slowly it changes them into another kind of man..
Some may even love the drinking and some would love the pleasures....
Thinking that whatever hit them are really the end of the world, so just what the hell their life..

It might help to relieve for some moments but it definitely changing a person...and yeah

just like a loyal man got dumped by a gf, emotional crashed and who knows what will happen next..
its quite true with the statement of Blair saying: They are all good before something happened to them, somebody stays good no matter how bad it is...

There are ppl willing to stay, there are ppl who like to run and go further..
Perhaps, it's time to look around which guy is actually there for sure when you need him...
time to treasure such friendship/r.ship just as who knows what will happen tomorrow?

Sometimes, changes are not all good (:

她说

2011-02-10T01:55:00.003+08:00

林俊杰 JJ – 她说 ta shuo

她竟悄悄的来过
ta jing qiao qiao de lai guo
她慢慢带走沉默
ta man man dai zou chen mo
只是最后的承诺
zhi shi zui hou de cheng nuo
还是没有带走了寂寞
hai shi mei you dai zou le ji mo

我们爱得没有错
wo men ai de mei you cuo
只是美丽的独秀
zhi shi mei li de du xiu
太折磨她说无所谓
tai zhe mo ta shuo wu suo wei
只要能在夜里翻来覆去的时候有寄托
zhi yao neng zai ye li fan lai fu qu de shi hou you ji tuo

等不到天黑烟火不会太完美
deng bu dao tian hei yan huo bu hui tai wan mei
回忆烧成灰还是等不到结尾
hui yi shao cheng hui hai shi deng bu dao jie wei
她曾说的无所谓我怕一天一天被摧毁
ta ceng shuo de wu suo wei wo pa yi tian yi tian bei cui hui
等不到天黑不敢凋谢的花蕾
deng bu dao tian hei bu gan diao xie de hua lei

雨也在跟随放开刺痛的滋味
yu ye zai gen sui fang kai ci tong de zi wei
今后不再怕天明我想只是害怕清醒
jin hou bu zai pa tian ming wo xiang zhi shi hai pa qing xing
不怕天明我想只是害怕清醒
bu pa tian ming wo xiang zhi shi hai pa qing xing

Those days.

2011-01-26T02:36:00.005+08:00

Since my high sch life has ended, I rarely meet my high sch frens and once i meet them
some of them will be telling me about my hair..
it's always changing, my hair it is...
I didn't really realized bout it so I dug out my old hard disk, which storing my old pictures to see the changes of my hairstyle over these 4 years..a bit jobless ere but it's healthy..haha
I gotta reminisce somehow (=

Nerd faces alert! plsss don't laugh!

2008

2009

2010

2011

Weee....I feel like perming my hair agaaaain!! xS

this and that

2011-01-23T02:09:00.003+08:00

there are two type of people...

these two types of people are those who are selfish to an extent that they are used to responsibilities to the others and act as if they' have nothing to do with it.
and
another type is those who rather to take all the blames to themselves even though it's not their obligation to carry any of the responsibilities...they just choose to keep quiet and try to make the world more peaceful.

however, the one who always take up all the blames will eventually suffer more than the one who push all da responsibilities..
why?
taking up all the blames and try to make people around them happy and less arguments...
so what?
only those who don't have to take up the responsibilities will be happier and will make more excuses so that the other person will help to carry the obligations...
you make people happy but who is there to make u happy?

you keep quiet and do what ppl want you to do, never fight back..eventually, those people will
only bully you...and the selfish one will never feeel suffered as they are so used to push the
difficult and non-beneficial tasks to the one who is willing to carry it..

Why is it so tiring to live a life? so many controls, so many can't and so many rules...
so much of concerns and rationality.....
All these!!...it's just tiring!!
Sighhh....why can't everything be more simple and not as complicated!

P/s: I think i'm emo tonite ):

Holidays

2010-12-30T02:59:00.001+08:00

Weee~~

Been staying @ home for few days all due to I'm taking a long hols for my coming exam!

Time flies really fast, it's like a blink of eyes! Looking back at the time when I was in high sch,
it's been 2 years since then...I've been spending 2 years time looking for my direction and approaching my life now...

To think of it, I think I was really naive and immature back in high sch and coming out from sch has made me a more mature girl...i guesS?
haha....2 years, i've beeen working n working while studying..such life is really tiring but all i got
is not only money..I guess i've learned a lot during these 2 years of working outside...

Life has just got more interesting with such a working+study lifestyle...
waking up early for classes and rushing for work after class...some friends of mine even ask me
don't you need a break?
I said, I want a break so badly but once I have a break, i would start to feel the boredom and feeling like working again...
Never want to stop working like totally?...it might kill me as I can't be too freee!!
nothing to do is bored and even more yawns...

* weee~~ cam whoring might be the best solution for boredom :D *

now i understand why the elders always tell me to enjoy my study life first before the working
life haunt me...
yeah..working is never easy..it sucks all ur energy..like really!

When you're working outside, there's nobody for you to rely on...only those kind colleagues
would offer their hand to help you when you need helps...
majority of the superior would take advantage of the staff, ask you to commit to the company and wanna see the sincere side of you while working...but how to show it?
well, to commit is actually asking you to do whatever they expect you to do...
regardless of whether it's in ur job scope anot...they tend to use you!

Why do they need to be like that?
well..some superior always can't do their job nicely or they're not committed enough for some reasons...so they tend to make use of their staff to fulfill what they need to do...
some would make the staff to do their job..usually are job that they are not willing to do..

in the world of working, nobody is totally generous nor kind i can say, most of them would try their best to be selfish so that they can save their ass in the end....being kind is never been a tactic to keep ur position in the company.

Some people think that giving in and be more hardworking would obtain good returns?
It's not like the saying of " the more you plough the more you gain "...it doesn't work that way anymore....if nobody is able to see your hard works and if those hard works are nothing to the others, it's equivalent to nothing..no return and every lil effort is equivalent to trash or ash..

since young, we were told to be hardworking but parents never tell us to be smart...
thought that being hardworking is everything but if you're putting all ur efforts on somthing that's not gonna expand ur ability or talents...it's just a waste of time..

when you're out there working, make sure ur superior treat u right and they can actually see
ur ability and not those who make use of ur ability only to assist them to keep their positions.

If you're lucky enough, you would find a mentor/superior who is willing to guide you and see your
success..

With loves,
Seanna (:

Pissifying!

2010-12-17T01:15:00.002+08:00

Finally all assignment is clear and I now have time for year end activities but somehow work
is just stopping me to have fun!!

Talking about Maxis, it's just damn pissifying!!
My bill gone up to 50 bucks in just 3 days and a month I usually use around 100++ has now
become 200!!

I sms as usual, use call as usual, use internet as usual and they dare to charge me so muchh..
I have packages to control and now Stupid Maxis is just being greedy!

I witness victim everyday when I sit @ da payment counter helping customers to clear their bill
4 out of 10 of them would come and ask why is their bill being over charged...I can't give them a real
answer but to ask them to check with maxis helpline...
Some of them are really innocent, customer came and telling me that they nvr even use to online
nor calling oversea...one of them even got barred after din clear the bill but the bill still
increasing after barred...Damn effking ridiculous

I work for maxis but i really know how ugly is their management...can really spit on them
* oooppsss *
Grr...really betahan, kinda sick of working for them telling customers wat's unclear and
sometimes i see those innocent customers paying for dunno what, i also pity them..

Really! if it was not bcoz of most of my frens are using maxis, i would've gone to other operator that
doesn't behave in such a greedy manner! * This is abit vague, i also dunno which operator isn't like this * I dislike monopoly!!!

Yeah..it does help me to save in a way but i really not happy that they just like to simply charge
people on their data service, especially those Iphone user..everytime come to pay $200 and it's twice in a month..i can see those familiar bill payment customers...
I somehow ask them why come pay again, not even a month..
they sadly tell me...got barred again..sigghhh, gonna pk for it...
All i can do to response is giving them a frenly smile and ask them to complain to the main hq!!

Indeed, there's a reason why people hates maxis and really anti it..just like some people
would love maxis and anti digi =.=

This is quite funny but i think customers made their choices for reasons...

however, the number of people hating maxis is increasing and i have to layan those frustrated customers everyday..it is quite disappointing and working @ maxis for so long makes me realize
how to give customers honest feedback which is asking them to COMPLAIN!
one of the VIP customers even tell me that they did try complaining for several times but
it din work at all....

that time, i can really see how maxis is losing their long term customers.

It's about 2 persons.

2010-11-26T13:41:00.006+08:00

Currently listening to Breakup hug-anthony neely.

Hmm...sounds emo for that song but I suka max!

Btw, just wanna drop by and post sth regarding of how i feel towards emotional control.

Have you ever ask yourself why would you be sad and tears over small lil matter?

Lets say,

When your fren is commenting about your work is not nice and gave all the negative comments, thus the feelings of anger instantly boast up to ur heart and you started to feeel as if u just got insulted?

the ego part of you is kinda cursing ur fren for commenting so much...but you have to bear with it and smile to act as if you're fine with their bad comments and go home become EMO?

when you're home, all the emo faces just appear and the one who really care for you can actually realize it, which is ur mum?

but you won't care you just throw ur temper to the ppl who care for u...and keep thinking wat's wrong with my work? and why must they condemn till such level?...did i do somthng to offence them?

This is what we call " thinking too much "

when you think beyond the level of what normal ppl should, you would become more emo

and refuse to tok to anybody or u would find sth to release it. End up, the feeling of " tak puas"

keep remaining until you keep that in ur heart. You might seem to be nothng in front of ur fren

cause you dun want them to know that you're feeling bothered by the way they commented.

therefore, your fren jus tot that telling you the truth by the very straight forward way doesn't

affect you and they would continue doing so when they have some disagreement with you.

Accumulatively, it becomes a sickness in heart..cause u actually damn mind about what they say

and you gotta act ntg when they comment about you...eventually your emotional control infront

of them would bcome worse and less patient..

and finally one day,

you burst, burst everythng out...

these everythng might include personal attck towards that particular fren, past incident that you don't feel happy, the way of that person present her/himself and all the bad stuffs would be presented in such arguments.

Therefore, people have such saying of when 2 persons are getting closer, arguments would be increased too....it's a way to understand each other better too...

If all don't go well and the mindset of judging each other doesn't change, such friendship is equivalent to a waste.

Same goes to couple,

fight every week and argue over small matter...those are the way to improve the relationship and to know each other better.

if after the arguments and all, the torn is still inside the heart, such relationship is not improving or going to any positive side..it's just spending time together and hurt each other till the extend of " betahan-ness "

break up would happen during the "betahan + tired " status...

it's quite common btw 2 persons when they are close and always spend time together..

taking each other for granted and started to feel frustrated easily when small thng happens..

the level of toleration n patient is decreasing as both of them expect each other will give way and all..but it doesn't go that way anymore as time goes by...

This is why couple are usually sweet for the first 3-6 months and they would start to experience the sourness and bitterness of a relationship after 6 mths...

it's the nature of man's behavior and if you can accept and stop judging one another, such challenge will be as simple as a piece of cake (:

I'm confused

2010-11-06T03:21:00.003+08:00

It's quite late for a day but pretty early for a morning,

I'm now sitting in front of my laptop listening to some old canto songs

in this very very dark room, the only light source is my lappie and

an external torch...

Under such quiet and dark environment, it's best to just type whatever my heart is trying to say here...at least it's a way of release and writing all here is better for me to judge if im thinking healthily..Lol

all these years since i was 9, family problem never failed to hit my brain...and make me to suffer

from concussion. I always talk about it not because i love whining, i understand whoever always listen to my same old problem will be dam pissed as i always take it as a topic...

I understand that, coz it is quite annoying too...but sometimes, i just couldn't help it as

it keeps hitting me..

how i wish i could just don't bother about it and head to bed..

in fact, it doesn't allow me to do so...i can try to ignore but in the end i'm still the one who suffer the most among all siblings...

Well, people may thinks that i'm taking stuffs to worry or another word " pessimistic"

I wish i could be more optimistic about my family but i just couldn't help it...they are such

selfish until the extend of me being so so so not sure about what's a real family.

people tell me, every family have their very own problems n issues...issues that can't be solved and

problems that can't be avoided...

sometimes, i just have to question...did ppl say that just to make those who facing family problem

to feel better?

A better solution here but i doubt it would ever be practical...

Since people are born to fight for their life...why not just learn how to be a real man,

a man that don't only think selfishly but a man who does what he/she needs to do in order

to be a person who doesn't feel sorry for him/herself...

What if one day, u realize somthing that you've done is making some people feel really

disappointed or sad? what will you do?

continue doing it as it doesn't really matter as u don't think it as a big matteR?

confess with them and say u're sorry?

I think people are indeed lack of the guts to admit failure or wrong...

therefore, they continue doing it to show that they don't really care about it...and try to

make it a norm for ppl to make such mistake...

haha...life is not just as simple as earning big money and having a good life..

those are too surface...what we really have to learn is how to be a man with humanity

and not

a man who would disgusts the people around...

P/s: here come the fresh air..

annoys

2010-11-05T00:45:00.008+08:00

Have you ever consider yourself to be a damn annoying person?

annoying towards ur frens, family or even to your love one?

Recently, some people just seem to be very very annoying, not that I say it cause I dislike them or what just, the annoyance could make me to enter bad mood.

They are kinda annoying cause they are kinda desperate of getting something and somehow just crying for it just like a annoying kid screaming for ICECREAM!!!

Can you imagine...??

that's da level of annoyance could be if someone is really really desperate to get something and they just backed to the age of 3 :(

People who are pretty annoying is when they thought being annoying could help them to get something that they want faster cause the one who got annoyed would wanna get over with it faster as well, for example, Liang po po being an debt collector?

Besides that, some people tend to misused facebook!!

spammer is everywhr and it really makes me crazee.....the sound of " pop pop pop pop"

could be annoying when the fellar is trying to send those emoticons and not to chat with u

and he's not someone that u really know! *annoying max*

SUCH AS THIS

* this fellar have been spamming my fb chat while i was using my headset to watch gossip gal,

he even dare to spam another 8 msges after I scolded him! dam fck up right?*

Do they actually realize that they are so so so annoying till people would have to block them from

callings, chatting or sms?

not as serious but it could be till that level if desperation goes up and up..

In fact, I do realize when I become desperate and start to be annoying...i know sometimes, It's hard to control but at least have to "jaga muka" abit right, so that ur fren won't be afraid of

you....

Annoyance is scary niaa...

But what if you being annoying is because you're too passionate to help someone who doesn't

really need your help?

that would be one pathetic case, ntg u would get in return except cold treatment..

and if the help doesn't go well, you will end up getting the blamee for helping..

Either way, also will get unlikable treatment afterward..cause when someone is begging u for help,

once they got what they need, i doubt they will still looking for u and in fact, they won't even bother

to contact you after all..

I can assure that..cause most people are like this...

P/s: just telling how i feel....definitely not trying to scold or offence anybody.

Lurve Jeh

2010-10-24T02:20:00.011+08:00

Oct 20 -20 10

It is a speciall day for my Jeh, Sylvia Chan Tze Chui..

On this Fine day, I Made 3 Different Wishes For her...

One was On msn, Coz she wasn't asleep yet when I was online around 2++

Wonder, what she was doin lar..might be feeling excited for the sing k session later for that day..:P

@ overtime Drinking..

Huggie with Bulat..

Then...I tried to make it special so, i adjusted my handphone clock to be exact same as My jeh's

so that, I could sms her @ the time of 10:20am...just to make it special by the number...hehe

however, I was one min late for that as I was distracted by the subject evaluation during college..

failure though....ahahha

However, I wanted to make it @ 20:10..but I totally forgot during the party..lol

so another failure....

End up, My this failure makes me abit kiasu..

I actually asked my Jeh to adjust her phone timing to be at 20:10 while it was around 12a.m of 21/10...lol

then I sent my jeh another wish...

well indeed, IT WORKS!!!

ahahaha...i know it's kinda lame but she actually played along with me and both of us laughed

non stop that time...

Haha..This is It!!!

awww...it has been loong since we last laughed together so badly...haha

Jeh..I really do miss youuuuu...

Missing those days that we always see each other regularly...

You're the only person who has been be there for me when I was really really down over

my stuffs back in a year++ time...

You..makes me realize quite a few of things that I need to beware of when I was 18th...

You always been thr for me when I need you advise...

I feel so glad that I have you as my godsis..

I never knew that I could have a sis like you...

Your patience with me..makes me feel that you are the only one who is willing to listen to my

nonsense thoughts and my crappy emotions..

Thanks Jeh for Your Everything!!

Hugggggieeeesssss!!!!

Jeh's B'day moments...

Mwahhh My Beloved Sis
(:

Love You Alwayss xD

Road not taken

2010-10-14T01:47:00.005+08:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

As I reach the age of 20, this poem frequently come to my mind...

Regardless of how the result is going to be, I've made choices for myself.. (:

2010-10-08T00:09:00.004+08:00

Toni Braxton- He wasn't man enough for me.

When the moon shine bright in the sky with that smiley face,

it's time to be a little sentimental while facing the laptop...

Erheemmmm....

I'm lacked of update recently cause really lack of time to catch up with old friends..

in a way, I really Miss THEM!!!

it has been long since i last reading other frens blog and today i Got the time for that as i was

alone @ sk and nothing to do as my phone low batt..

I don't know why it low batt so easily! i tot E5 battery is awesomely good but i was wrong lar!!

those online review somehow cheated me!!

It always goes out of batt in a day time and all i did was mainly on sms and email...

does it need to give up on me every 24 hrs after charged!!! feel geram somehow.. =X

So...

I chose few of my frens blog to read and majority of them alrdy stopped blogging..lol

i can't dig any news..and few of them had some sentimental entries...hmm

tat's what i feel interested!!

then then..things that I've realised long time ago is happening all around my frens..

Basically it just happen to everyone...

Hmm..thing like relationship and all??

normal routine like..Love each other dam much @ the beginning then arguments take place...

feelings started to change and both are sick of each other...

the ending is predictable...

However, we stil nvr give up on trying and continue seeking for love...

Isn't that the greatest keen of human?

we often hear about people are giving up on their career, studies, building r.ships with parents..

or gf bf by saying " I'm really tired in looking for love..it's very hurtful and starting from zero is kinda waste of time"

Yeah...indeed i heard of that line really often when somone break up

but after a while, the person who actually say that line tend to forget about what he/she said and in the end found another companion...

but if people who often say, aiyoor..im not gonna study anymore..im not good @ it...

usually end up working and really give up on further studies...

Human is unique in a way that they can change their mind real fast..

some people would conclude this type of people as unstable and not firm with their decision but

if it's about love, i doubt it would be awful if ppl change their mind to more optimistic...

once u get hurt doesn't mean the nex time you are gonna get hurt again...

doesn't mean the nex person woould love you as the previous did...

People fell down and stand up again..just like how a 2 yrs old baby learning how to walk...

What we've learned since we were baby could be applied in the future...

When we fall, we really could be freaking pessimistic and some would become depressed..

but all we need is actually somebody we care to support us by our side and guide us no matter that person is your bestie, stranger, parent or just anybody..

We have all the right to be emo, sad, upset, depress but however there's this moment we all are able to stand up and fight again just like a bald guy found a hair fall solution...(:

Everybody is still holding up and fighting for everyday mainly are bcause of they still care and still Love...even though most of us in this city are getting more realistic and some are materialistic..

Like from the movie i have recently watched.- detective dee..

The king which is the first female king in china, she said : to become a major event, loved ones can kill"

I direct translate from google la..the meaning is basically saying if you wanna be successful, you can even get rid of the one you love.

It was somthing that olden days people practice during war time..they believe that

if you wanna be the top of everybody else..you have to take up this cruel game...

yeah....when i found out that there's some animal-like behavior of human thru the newspaper,

I'm pretty sad to know that some people actually did that to achieve whatever they want and at the same time the price they pay for it, is actually the greatest....because they chose to give up to be a real human just to gain something else.

Thanks god,

those are just the minority, i still see beautiful sunshine around this hectic world

and love in the air is not just a metaphor...

hmmm...just wishing people around me after 30 years are as beautiful...(:

P/s: I'm loving my life noow!!!

Nightmare devil!

2010-09-30T02:20:00.005+08:00

If only if freedom could be borrowed...

If my parents aren't that old age thinking, i think my freedom is just as loose as snapping my fingers.

Well, things don't go that way though...so it's difficult for me to do whatever i really wanna do..

Because of that, i somehow have to lie to them which i really lousy at..

Lying is just not my type of thing coz truth is kinda easy to reveal if i talk to them when i feel like sharing my stuffs..

It's right that my dad is being such strict to my curfew and i can understand why he did that but

the way he questions me about why am i coming home so late and all is making me feel so frustrated.

why??

Just let you know abit about my daddy,

he is someone whom tot that he knows young people very much as he been thru da worse i guess..

and he likes to drink..so everytime he questions me about my lifestyle thingy, he was kinda tipsy

which present the bad-tempered him!

When that happen, even the whole iceberg shifted to cool him down is not gonna work!

He's as ego as a buffalo...no one around him could change his mind..

this is why i can't take his way of handling children.

Siggh...i memang not stress about studies and work but the most stressful thing in my daily life is actually how to find excuses when he ask " why are u coming home later than me??, if you ever do it again..I'm gonna go up to whr u work and screw all ur frens...Don't u dare challenge me..I would do that if alcohol taken"

Ahh...tak stress ke??

i feel really dam stress...i balik rumah always around 1..yet he says I'm being ridiculous..

yeah true lar..for a girl, it's bad for me to come home late but i just can't accept the way he questions me..I'm worse than a prisoner?

These few days...I got few nightmares d...

first was about the shitty phone and another is about my crappy dad!!

Life is good but with these unnecessary stress, i tend to have worries...

Sighh..if only if i can borrow some freedoms from some people..

Blaaa blaaaa..I think I'm getting fatter though..hee

eat sleep sit~~

Sleepless night before melaka.

2010-09-25T03:49:00.006+08:00

It has been long since i last visit to melaka..:D

However, tat's not the main point..I just don't feel like sleeping after movie-ing with all my colleagues and my saayaang!!

Hmm..it's my sentimental time..Time for me to summarize what have happened recently and writing down all my thoughts here..(:

Here it goess :D

As a girl, I think I do have many close Girl frens, i care about them and no doubt that i really treasure them as my close gfs..

Gfs are priceless and it is so hard to get close gfs as girls are one of the most troublesome creature in this world..To find a gf that could really click with need something that we call "fate"

For example, Serena and blair on gossip girl... this drama might be da most bimbo show but it does show how two bestie go thru their teenage life together gether..

P/s: Sorry if I'm too obsess to that drama..:D

It's something that whoever @ my age would have experienced as it comes along with the way we grow.

While we are going thru backstabbing, pin pointing, judging, suspecting and all our heart started to grow thicker n thicker in da sense of getting stronger..

Friends forever is what I always say back in primary sch days..but the percentage of my primary sch friends whom I'm still contacting is just as low as 15%?

As we grow older...we changed and friends are really come and go..

however, there must be some friends that will always contacting you once a while even if each other are having busy lifestyle.

I'm glad that I have few of them..really feeling dam happie for that..

They are friends that I can't just rub away even if it takes months for us to meet up and all...surely will miss each other as time goes by.

by that, you tend to concern about what they are doing and problems that they might face.

when these priceless besties come to you for advises, you will never say no nor just show the layan face coz they are people that you couldn't throw them aside and not bothering them while they are having problems.

One day, bad news knock the door!

for example, one of them come to you and tell you how screwed up they are and how suck is their life right now..they are being lost couldn't get a way out..

Have you ever experienced that?

Your beloved kawan come to you and say...I'm living in a life that is not suitable for me and I'm struggling every night...

Well..I recently go thru that..and my response was!!

I feel sad along with her, I cry along with her...it happens when I'm feeeeling extremely helpless towards the situation..My advices, solutions and all are not working @ all...

From there, I really feel heartache.....this is not the heartache when I have to say break up with my bf, not that kind of heartache when my dad is doing somthing ridiculous but that kind of heartache where I feeling so so so helpless, i can only stare @ what's happening and feel the pain that my fren is going through.

When I know that there's nothing that I can do to make her come back to the normal her, the pain instantly hit me in my heart and tears drop...thick phlegm started to make me feel hard to breath and keep crying crying along...

That feeling has somehow make me realize how much she meant to me..

*************************************************

Reminiscing...

Foong ling and I..it was 2 yrs ago

Kitt and I...we used to share this blog though

Crazee night with Melia and Tim

The silly friend of mine :D

If nt mistaken, 2 yrs ago also..lol

last yr i think.. was @ A.C

Lurvieess (:

Think!

2010-08-30T02:30:00.006+08:00

yup yup yup...I'm here (:

Hmmm..shall start this with my family event.

It's gonna be sth related to the pic..:D

It has been loong since i last attended my dad's side family event..

It was a birthday celebration for a 1 yr old lil baby and a 21st b'day..well

the purpose was more on gathering relatives from far so that we can somehow catch up..

i guess so..but i was kinda bored and i talk to those old relatives rather than the group around my age...

It's not a bad experience, i can say it's quite a time to communicates with the elders..:D

for such event, beer must be thre and also my dad's fav.

As usual, my dad did touched some sentimental stuffs..

by that, only i come to realize that my uncle actually had some girl behind my aunt back in 20 yrs ago...but my aunt still keeping her angers and wanna have sth like divorce which drag one of her son into this issue.

my not so close uncle...did admit his mistakes and try to save things up but his son was rather showing his non mercy to his dad over these 20 years by scolding, blaming and pin pointing @ his mistakes...

Bcoz of this, as my uncle is experienced in his past jobs so he was offered to go to europe and work..he only gotta come back to malaysia once a year over 3 years of contract...

More information on my uncle, he had cancer..he went thru treatment and all..now he's recovered

during the treatment he was afraid that he was gonna leave this world so he left his every property and just everything to his wife and the family...

however after he went thru the war with cancer, he got cold treatment from da wife and the son..

only the younger son is being neutral and look after the dad.. as he had no job before this europe

contract offer.

he was depress and therefore he chose to go so far to work so that he can avoid watever he is facing now...

He's not some young man but a man who's now 58 yr old...how sad is it to see an old man to travel so far just to cure his depression?

I couldn't help but wonder if he's my dad...would it be da same for him? same to have such ending??

couldn't predict wtv might happen during that 3 yrs long @ europe...he might be too lonely or too depress being alone thre without warmth from the family...

not to forget he had cancer...=/

Something just pop out...

Is it one mistake can cause one person life to be over?

and ....would you ever wanna be like the son or the wife to make this pathetic man to live his life in pain even though he's one of your family member?

he paid his children for colleges, house and every lil needs that the children need.

does he deserve to get such treatment over a huge mistake of having an affair?

It's not like he didn't care about his family or he wasn't responsible for the family...

well..I might not know how big the impact he had brought to the family over these years..

but i certainly sure that we should feel appreciate!

Every lil thing that a father should give to the son does count and as a child we should feel

lucky cause we have a father who give us what we need.

His son is now forcing him to be more depress and feeling hopeless over the family..why must the family do that to punish him??

those punishment made him to look at the sky with grey and never gonna think positive...

only thing that can distract him is WORK!!! sounds so sad...

when i look @ my uncle i see pain in his eyes and he looked so different compare with those times....

he's abit blur with everything and tend to forget things real fast..even things that i just told him..

@ neway celebrating bro's b'day :)

From what i think,

the wife has every right to be mad @ what he did but the wife should put her feet into her husband's shoe after all these years...

feel how her husband feel when the son is ignoring him and scold him for every lil thing...

As for the son, i think he should be grateful that he has such father who look after of his every lil thing from the baby him until the him of being a father...

the family still supporting him....why can't he be more grateful by not pushing his dad to one corner?

I might be a third party to see this whole thing but i think every human deserve a second chance and deserve to have lovess with caresss....

if a ego man is willing to say sorry and sorry for the huge mistake he had made, i think

he deserve his second chance....

he's a rich man but now he has ntg...!!

Forgiveness is very important...

Why don't practice it?

Spare some love and look @ bad things in a different way i think my uncle would be happier

and not a man who wanna escape during his late life.

It's not a emo entry...

A lesson to learn though...just wanna say...if you don't forgive now,

one day u might regret that you won't have the chance to forgiveee...:]

I somehow do blame my dad for doing not enuff..

but...those are just for emo moments...he however raise me till now..and

whatever he has done shall be moved on though..:)

can't be calculative after all...he's my dad!! Lurvieees